Is this really about me?

Good Morning! Last week, I shared one of Don Miguel Ruiz’s Four Agreements:

Be Impeccable With Your Word.

This week, I’d like to share the second agreement, one that can change how we experience our relationships.

Don’t Take Anything Personally.

Ruiz reminds us that what other people say and do is often a reflection of their own reality: their experiences, beliefs, fears, and perceptions.

How often have you allowed someone else’s bad mood to ruin your day?

How often have you replayed a conversation, wondering why someone said something hurtful or didn’t acknowledge you?

And how often have you made their behavior mean something about YOU? I know I do!

Sometimes we take things personally because they touch an old insecurity, a belief that we’re not good enough, a fear of being rejected or misunderstood.

What if it’s touching an old belief you’ve carried for years?

Great News! What triggers us can also teach us something.

Instead of reacting, defending ourselves, or jumping onto that familiar hamster wheel of negative thoughts, we can get curious.

Why did that bother me so much?

What am I making this mean about me?

Is there an old story I’m telling myself that might not even be true?

Someone else’s opinion of you does not have to become your opinion of yourself. And someone else’s behavior does not have to steal your peace.

Of course, this doesn’t mean we stop caring, listening to feedback, or taking responsibility. It simply means we recognize the difference between what belongs to us and what belongs to someone else.

This week I invite you to practice one simple thing. The next time you feel yourself taking something personally, pause and ask:

“Is this really about me, or am I making it about me?”

Because sometimes the greatest gift in a difficult moment isn’t changing the other person. It’s discovering something about ourselves that we’re finally ready to let go of.

Happy Monday! ❤️
Colette