Why Starting Feels Harder Than Doing (and What Helps)

Hello from rainy/sunny California!

Welcome to my Monday Morning Message!

It’s Not Laziness — It’s the Starting

Every new year we focus on fresh starts and new goals. What we talk about less? The unfinished things that quietly follow us into January.

That was me recently — my 2025 to-do list was still filled with tasks I’d been avoiding for months and it made me cranky to think I still hadn't done them. The phone calls to friends I hadn’t returned… Would they be mad at me? The dentist appointment I knew I should make but kept putting off.

When I finally sat down and started because I was tired of being cranky, something surprising happened. The list was done faster — and easier — than I expected. First I admitted to my husband why I was cranky. It makes it easier to say it out loud and have someone say....I get it.....The first phone call felt hard, but when my friend didn’t hang up on me, the next three calls felt like a breeze.

There’s actually a name for this: task initiation anxiety. It’s when starting something feels much harder than actually doing it. Our brains tend to overestimate how difficult, awkward, or uncomfortable a task will be, so we avoid it — not because we’re lazy, but because we’re human.

The phone call. The appointment. The email.

Often, those aren’t the problem. The starting is.

So maybe this new year isn’t only about starting over. Maybe it’s about gently finishing what’s still hanging around — without shaming yourself for how long it took.

💛 A gentle invitation: Pick one small thing you’ve been avoiding and give yourself just five minutes to start. Momentum often follows.

Here are a few research-backed ways to make starting easier:

• The 5-Minute Rule: Commit to just five minutes. Starting is usually the hardest part.
• Micro-Steps: Break tasks down until the first step feels almost laughably small.
• Body Doubling: Work near someone else (even silently) to create structure. ( I call this having a buddy and is my favorite one.)
• Dopamine Stacking: Pair a hard task with something pleasant, like music or a favorite podcast.
• Visual Cues: Use timers, checklists, or visual reminders to signal “start” to your brain.

Happy 2026!

With warmth, Colette

Click here to learn more about Colette Sherouse Coaching.